Communication

Sounding Board

Sounding Board

Have you ever needed to tell someone something that you felt was uncomfortable and found yourself agonizing over what to say, when to say it, what the other person would say? I still battle this depending on how important or new the relationship is.  But I have learned to sound out my thoughts with a trusted friend and then just have a conversation with the intended person! If you practice coming from Love for yourself and them, that love will guide you to the best words to be heard and understood, but also to help YOU understand.

Today I will trust a friend to help me sort out my feelings before I approach someone with my concerns.  I will come from Love and know there is always a solution.

Are We There Yet?

Are We There Yet?

I am very goal oriented. I love meeting my deadlines and doing my job well. I even enjoy the journey! But sometimes in my personal relationships I have to remember THEIR process and MY process wil not be the same. How they meet their goals is unique unto them and I must practice Love First to allow that process while honoring my own.

Today I will be aware of how those I participate with manage their process and be open to finding compromise with mine.

Who You Are

Who You Are

Flip side to Who Are You is this, when you meet someone new LISTEN. There is an old saying, “Who you are is so loud I can’t hear what you are saying.” What that means is that the energy of a person emanates from them, and if you are paying attention and listening with your entire body, you will “HEAR” who they really are, regardless of their words and sometimes, even their actions. So take the time to listen with your inner being and allow the new person to tell you who they are.

“Today I will practice listening to others with my entire being, not just my ears.”

Get it Straight

Get it Straight

Have you ever had a conversation with a friend and something they said, not necessarily something negative, was not clear? I had that happen recently and had to really think about when and how to bring up the issue to get clarification. How many times have people thought they have been clear only to find out they were not? When I did speak to my friend it was from a place of love and genuine concern, and we were able to talk until we both felt understood.

“Today I will listen with an open mind and ask for clarity with Love.”

Getting it All Done

Getting it All Done

I love to be busy! Work hard, play hard, then do nothing for a week.  But sometimes we take on more than we can manage and then it is important to re-assess and be honest with yourself and with those to whom you have made a commitment. Learning how to prioritze your tasks is so necessary and I recommend the Franklin Covey system, it’s fantastic! But also being humble enough to say that maybe, just maybe, you can’t get it all done as promised so you need a little more time? Better to be a little late than be on time and completely overwhelmed.

“Today I am willing to look at my commitments and make sure I have only taken on what I can do well.”

It’s Not About You. (really)

It’s Not About You. (really)

When I don’t hear back from someone I used to have the default position that it is because they are either upset with me or I am not important to them. Technology makes it almost too easy to stay in touch so we think people should answer us within 10 seconds of sending a message! Here’s the truth:  It’s not about you. People are busy, there’s bad cell reception, or maybe they want to think before they react.  All good reasons to take a deep breath and know that you will get an answer at some point, and if the person makes a habit of not communicating well then you may want to think about why you have them in your life.

“Today I will give people a break and know that my worthiness is not tied to their timely response.”

Active Listening

Active Listening

Lately I have noticed that many people are only half listening.  Either because they are not interested in what is being said, or they are busy and distracted.  Here’s the deal: Have enough love and respect for yourself and the other person to just say: “I am sorry but I am really distracted right now.  Unless this is urgent, could we talk later?”  In the end both parties will feel more satisfied.

“Today I will practice being an “active listener” and if I can’t be present to the conversation I will let the other person know.”

Love First and Business

Love First and Business

I have done workshops to assist co-workers to communicate better, employees and bosses learn how to have a productive dialogue, and entrepreneurs how to envision and then execute their dreams.  The one thing these groups have in common? They all signed up because they really did want to do their best.  I don’t believe in answering a question that has not been asked because that answer would be irrelevant.  What do you want and why do you want it? That’s my first question to you.

“Today I will ask myself what I want to achieve and why I want it.  Step one.”

Whisper

Whisper

When I was growing up there was this perfume commercial where they said, “If you want to capture someone’s attention, whisper.” And it’s true.  The loudest voice does not always command attention.  So next time you have something important to say to your partner, children, or close friends, try a soft voice.

“Today I will take a gentler approach.”

Miscommunication

Miscommunication

Remember those great movies where someone sends a letter to their loved one and it never reaches them? All kinds of tragedy ensue and great loves are lost. Assuming that someone got the text, the email, got the voicemail, saw the post, is just ridiculous.   Nothing beats a real conversation.  It is only in having a dialogue and hearing the tone of the words that we can really comprehend the message being delivered.  So try the human connection next time you have something important to say, and keep trying until you are sure the message has really been received.

“Today I will make the effort to communicate in a more human and compassionate manner.”

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