I have been a caretaker all my life: big family and oldest daughter equals “caretaker”. But in relationships, taking care of your partner, family member, or friend can turn into something else which isn’t always healthy. Being empathetic and giving support are wonderful qualities in a friend, parent, lover, or spouse, but when that caring turns into enabling or “doing too much’, it’s time to take a look at three things:
First, to make sure your caring is out of love and not the fear of being rejected if you don’t take care of the other person.
Second, that they have actually demonstrated that they would like your help and are willing to receive it.
Third, that you are not enabling someone to stay “stuck” because you are trying to “save” them.
“Today, I will notice if the “help” I am offering is coming from love or fear, and if the person I want to help has actually asked for me to do so.”